Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Defining Bro Lit

If we're going to call Matched or The Adults Chick Lit, or redefine Pride & Prejudice and all of Jane Austen's* books as Chick Lit and put it in the Chick Lit section and condescendingly call it Chick Lit: I now call into usage the word Bro Lit to label what most non-reading males "read".

Hemingway was alpha as fuck.
The first step in any twelve step program is to admit it: I am a guy and I read Chick Lit. It doesn't bother me that some of the books I read are intended--clearly intended in bright pink book jackets and big swoopy title letters--to be read by women only. What bothers me is the subsection of men who only read Bro Lit and call them normal books while calling what I read vagina material.

You are not reading normal books anymore, guys. You haven't been for a while. You are now reading what I--and hopefully more people--will condescendingly call Bro Lit. Because Bro, no brah reads Curtis Sittenfeld, that's totally beta.

What is bro lit:

I need a subsection on GoodReads for Bro Lit. I need an author to come forward and say "I am alpha as fuck and I write Bro Lit, bro" (hopefully Martin Amis). I need a trending topic on Twitter about Bro Lit: "Bro, your brain is your strongest muscle, read #BroLit ". I want to walk into my local gym and overhear two guys doing bench presses while discussing American Psycho's themes of consumerism and all the while talking about how awesome Patrick Bateman is because he's the most epic brah ever, bro, and he gets all the bitches with his epic abs**.

Eventually we will all find common ground. We can start calling Chick Lit fiction again. We can go back to a time before Patrick Bateman was a hero to the bros because he worked out and banged hookers. Hopefully we'll all be readers again and I can read The Man of my Dreams in peace without being considered girly. One day the bros will be discussing Jane Austen while the girls talk Bro Lit over hot wings and beer because equality, bro, equality.

If all else fails... I'll just start hiding the pink book jacket somewhere.

Note: I know the title Hitting On Girls in Bookstores might make it seem like this blog is about picking up girls, but it's not. It's about relationships and romance and dating and awkward glances. It's not about actually picking up chicks.

*I really take issue with this. As both a guy and a fan of Austen's work.
**This has actually happened to me. Well, minus the consumerism bit.


  1. Does that mean when the robot zombie ninjas inevitably take over, only the most Bro will survive?

  2. Thought you would like to know your post has inspired a Teen Bro Lit display @ my library. I almost feel like I should run the titles past you.

  3. Christiana, I would love to see a picture of that. If you want to run a few titles past me I'm game. I can think of a few coughTheCatcherintheRyecough.

    James, yes they would, because the bros would use their abs that they work five days a week by doing a Care Bear stare type thing.

  4. And people made fun of me for perfecting my Care Bear Stare stance. Who's laughing now?! HaHA!

  5. I somehow randomly found your blog through the tweets & OMG I CAN NOT STOP LAUGHING. You are hilarious. I love it.

    "What bothers me is the subsection of men who only read Bro Lit and call them normal books while calling what I read vagina material." hahahaha Tears are happening.

  6. What Ginger said! Vagina material!!!! HAHA

    and there are people out there who read "Bang: More Lays in 60 Days!?" geez...

  7. "I am alpha as fuck...". Cracking me up. That chick lit label has proved problematic.

  8. Check out my new blog "Sh*t Married Women Say"

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